In this blog we’ll explore the benefits of self-soothing, how it benefits your baby’s growth, and what you can do to gently support this process in a safe and nurturing way.
As a caregiver it’s natural to want to comfort your baby through every upset. Those sweet cuddles are pure magic – you want to soak up every snuggle, every sigh, and yes, every delicious little head sniff!
But did you know that the ability to self-sooth is a vital developmental milestone? Self-soothing is the ability for your baby to calm themselves without external help, and it plays a key role in emotional regulation, sleep habits, and independence.
Let’s explore the benefits of self-soothing, and what you can do to gently support this process in a safe and nurturing way.
What is Self-Soothing?
Self-soothing is your baby’s ability to fall asleep without the need for an adult to rock, cuddle, pat or sing them to sleep. It helps your little one regulate emotions and calm themselves down if they wake up or are a little anxious or stressed.
Self-soothing doesn’t come naturally to most babies and it’s a skill they need to be taught. Ideally babies begin successfully self-soothing anywhere aged between three months to one year. But it is important to remember that many babies can hit milestones a little earlier or a little later than that.
Why Is Self-Soothing Important?
According to CuddleCo, self-soothing can set your little one up for a lifetime of good sleeping habits. Here are just a few of the ways self-soothing can benefit both you and your baby.
Helps to Regulate your Baby’s Emotions: Babies who learn to self-soothe often grow into toddlers—and eventually adults—who can manage their emotions and settle themselves into restful sleep. After all, no one wants to be rocking their 30-year-old child to sleep every night!
Your Baby Becomes More Independent: When your baby learns to comfort themselves, they are also able to regulate their moods and needs better. A peaceful night’s sleep will leave them with engaged brains ready to develop and learn even more new skills, because they aren’t fighting tiredness and irritability.
Helps Them to Sleep for Longer: According to Sense – If your baby self-soothes when they come into the light sleep state, they are more likely to settle back to sleep. This means that they are linking their sleep cycles. It’s the start of sleeping for longer stretches and when appropriate, sleeping through the night.
You Will Feel More Rested and Happier: If your little one is able to sleep without tears and fuss, you will feel so much better. You will get back an extra few hours in the day to tick off house-hold chores or even just sprawl out on the sofa and eat some chocolate! Your days and nights will feel a lot more relaxing and less pressured.
When Can You Start Self-Soothing?
You can start introducing self-soothing from around three months onward. It’s best to begin gradually and not rush it. It’s important that your little one is able to soothe naturally and in their own time.
How To Teach Your Baby to Self-Soothe
Here are some tips to help you to successfully self-sooth your little one:
Start Gradually: If you’re used to cuddling or comforting your baby to sleep, begin by choosing one nap a day to gently shift the routine. Lay them down when they’re drowsy but still awake, and see if they can settle on their own.
Create a Consistent Sleep Routine: Establishing a predictable sleep routine helps your little one recognise when naptime and bedtime are approaching. Over time, it becomes a natural and comforting part of their daily rhythm.
Don’t Rush to Comfort Them: We know it can be difficult, but if your baby starts crying, try to pause for a couple of minutes before intervening. This gives them chance to find their fingers or toes and begin soothing themselves. If they don’t settle after a few minutes, then go in and gently comfort them back to sleep.
Soothe Them in Their Cot: If your baby wakes and needs comforting, try soothing them while they remain in their cot. This helps them learn to drift off to sleep without needing to be rocked or cuddled each time.
Introduce a Comfort Object: Choose a soft toy, muslin, or dummy that your baby can associate with comfort. When they cry, wait two minutes before gently offering the object – rather than feeding, rocking, or patting. In time, they’ll learn to find it themselves and settle back to sleep.
Learning to self-soothe can be a gradual process, so don’t be disheartened if your baby goes back and forth in their ability to settle themselves to sleep. Even as adults, we all have nights where drifting off isn’t easy!
Sleep and Rest Policy
At Sandytots we adhere to a strict Sleep and Rest policy, supported by The Lullaby Trust, to ensure your child naps safely and comfortably. All practitioners who look after children in our baby room have also completed Safer Sleep training, equipping them with essential practices to safeguard infants against sleep-related risks.
We understand how important regular sleep routines are for your child’s well-being. That’s why we work closely with parents and carers to keep routines consistent between home and nursery. This partnership ensures your child’s needs are met, helping them to thrive in a nurturing and supportive environment.
If you’re beginning your self-soothing journey, speak to your child’s key worker – they’ll be more than happy to support you along the way.
